Fruita CO Agents Checking in...

Fruita Colorado has always been a prize Goathork has pined after. Fruita is strategically located between "Family Fist" and the "Zion Curtain". Such a stronghold could really empower Goatkind. After many failed attempts we have inseminated this rural Colorado town with an agent.
After years of waiting, hoping, wishing for a word we received our first report from our implant. We expected a long detailed report quoting infrastructure, key targets for surgical assassination and listings of available low rent apartments. But all we received was this picture.

Disappointment was all we could feel at first. After having the smartest part of the herd analyze the report it became clear there was only one explanation. Our Agent; who is only known as Agent Heather has damn near drunken all of Christianity under the table! The minions of Christ are at their limit. Rejoice goats, we expect Jesus to surrender in person any day now!

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