8/14/2007

"God damn it to hell" or "unforeseen consequences of the Patriot Act"

We all know about the Patriot Act right? Or do we?

  In a little know clause of the Patriot Act, Jerry Lewis has been given the ability to apprehend and incarcerate anyone he wants. This was a power probably meant for GW but it was accidental given to JL.

  So, to make a long story short... There I am; just walking down the street in my bunny suit. Not a care in the world. I had stopped to help a little girl tie her shoes, then bam!!! Jerry Lewis and six mimes jump out from behind a stop sign. I almost said, "What the fuck!" but I didn't want to swear in front of the little girl, so I bit my tongue, OUCH! Now my mouth is filled with the taste of blood and the mimes are motioning violently at me and moving in my direction. Jerry adjusts his beret, lights a cigarette and smiles.

  I turn to the little girl and say, "Honey you better run along, this isn't gonna be pretty".

  Before I know it she has a gun in my face and in a thick Russian accent she says, "you can go easy or we can do it my way", I turned just as a mime hit me square with a giant red clone show. Every thing faded to black with "We got' em Mr. Baskim repeating over and over in my head.

  Then I woke up here.

  I have been told that I have no rights in here and I am not aloud to tell where here is but I can say it is filled with mimes. And they are really getting to me.

  Jerry said he would grant me my freedom if I raised $1200 for his telethon. He said if I didn't he would make me watch an endless loop of mimes acting out all 19 failed episodes of the Larry David show. You gotta save me.

 

GO here and do the right thing! Don't make me give Jerry your email address!

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